A: So, what’s new?
B: Lots. Been putting up more articles for our reader….
A: Good. Anything else?
B: Lots of writing, ideas, you know?
A: Well done. Anything interesting though?
B: I’ve been reading a lot of questionnaires in magazines.
A: Anything you want to tell me about?
B: No. Just the usual – imagining you were famous and having people asking you lots of questions. You ever imagine that?
A: I’m 7. Sounds look school to me.
B: Right. But anyway I’ve been wondering what I’d say if someone asked me what the last book I’d read.
A: Easy – ‘Hannah the Happy Ever After Fairy’. Do I get a point?
B: No. It doesn’t work like that. You’ve got to answer it in a way that makes you look intelligent.
A: Oh.
B: So I thought I’d say something inspirational, obscure, retrospective or foreign.
A: Not ‘Hannah the Happy Ever after Fairy’ then?
B: Fails on all levels. Something like ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’ – Viktor Frankl.
A: Wow and what was it like?
B: Well I didn’t actually read it, but it’s on my list of books to read.
A: But wouldn’t that sound pretentious?
B: A little. So then I thought I’d go deliberately down market.
A: And …
B: ‘Big Brother – Access All Areas‘.
A: But you haven’t read that either?
B: It’s on the list.
A: Why not (and let’s be crazy and go out on a limb here) just tell me the last book you read.
B: Well there’s a problem in that I rarely finish a book. I get bored.
A: In school they make us finish our books.
B: Well life’s different.
A: I guess so…. So the last book you finished was?
B: Can’t remember.
A: Last book you started?
B: Blink, Vernon God Little, Dance of Change, Grumpy Old Men, Colloquial Welsh, Understanding Psychometric Testing in a week, Sudoku Christmas Special…
A: Isn’t Sudoku just word search for the middle classes?
B: Probably. Anyway who on earth would want to know what a complete stranger reads? Who cares what others think?
A: Good point. Well made.
B: Can we finish this now? Bored.
A: If you like.
byron kalies 