The Last Book You Read

A: So, what’s new?

B: Lots. Been putting up more articles for our reader….

A: Good. Anything else?

B: Lots of writing, ideas, you know?

A: Well done. Anything interesting though?

B: I’ve been reading a lot of questionnaires in magazines.

A: Anything you want to tell me about?

B: No. Just the usual – imagining you were famous and having people asking you lots of questions. You ever imagine that?

A: I’m 7. Sounds look school to me.

B: Right. But anyway I’ve been wondering what I’d say if someone asked me what the last book I’d read.

A: Easy – ‘Hannah the Happy Ever After Fairy’. Do I get a point?

B: No. It doesn’t work like that. You’ve got to answer it in a way that makes you look intelligent.

A: Oh.

B: So I thought I’d say something inspirational, obscure, retrospective or foreign.

A: Not ‘Hannah the Happy Ever after Fairy’ then?

B: Fails on all levels. Something like ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’ – Viktor Frankl.

A: Wow and what was it like?

B: Well I didn’t actually read it, but it’s on my list of books to read.

A: But wouldn’t that sound pretentious?

B: A little. So then I thought I’d go deliberately down market.

A: And …

B: ‘Big Brother – Access All Areas‘.

A: But you haven’t read that either?

B: It’s on the list.

A: Why not (and let’s be crazy and go out on a limb here) just tell me the last book you read.

B: Well there’s a problem in that I rarely finish a book. I get bored.

A: In school they make us finish our books.

B: Well life’s different.

A: I guess so…. So the last book you finished was?

B: Can’t remember.

A: Last book you started?

B: Blink, Vernon God Little, Dance of Change, Grumpy Old Men, Colloquial Welsh, Understanding Psychometric Testing in a week, Sudoku Christmas Special…

A: Isn’t Sudoku just word search for the middle classes?

B: Probably. Anyway who on earth would want to know what a complete stranger reads? Who cares what others think?

A: Good point. Well made.

B: Can we finish this now? Bored.

A: If you like.

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